Career Management

What to do when you had a bad day at work

Posted by on Jun 7, 2016 in Career Management | 0 comments

It was one of those days. One of those days when I left work I was just done. One of those days that left me feeling drained and exhausted.

All said and done, this bad work day is nothing more than a series of less-than-ideal experiences. My life is neither better nor worse for a bad day at work. But as I sat down to write, and believe me, I didn’t want to, I got to thinking about getting over the bad-day slump. What am I going to make of this day?

Oh, that’s right, I get to decide what to make of this day. The frustration and stress are over now. Am I really going to let this unpleasant experience ruin my evening, too?

The answer is no.

Moving past a bad day isn’t just about feeling better. A positive attitude helps you get more done, appreciate life more, and other people are more likely to appreciate you. And the more people appreciate you, the more likely you are to get recognized and rewarded at work. I want more good stuff at work, don’t you?

So that got me thinking about how I can turn around a bad day. And I can think of lots of ways. Then I thought, “this would make a pretty good blog post!”

So maybe you had a bad day, too. And maybe you are going to take responsibility for yourself and your happiness. Maybe you’re looking for ways to move on from a bad day. I got you covered.

How to turn around a bad day

had a bad day

Get your body moving!

Exercise releases endorphins that trigger positive feelings. So get your body moving. Take a walk. Dance to your favorite song. Go for a bike run. Go for a run. It doesn’t matter how you move your body as long as you move it!

Eat a delicious meal

Studies show that eating can also release stress-reducing endorphins. Dark chocolate and spicy foods are specifically known to boost good feelings. Maybe sometimes it’s okay to eat for your mood.

Drink a cool, tall glass of water

Did you know even mild hydration can negatively affect your mood? It’s true. So drink a tall glass of refreshing H2O because hydration makes you happy!

Get gratitude

Gratitude is an instant mood-lifter! Take out a piece of paper and write down what you’re grateful for- anything and everything you’re grateful for- including things you enjoy about your work. Try to list at least 10 things. You’re probably feeling better already!

Don’t complain

When you complain you revisit a negative experience over and over again. If your complaint won’t result in a change in your situation, well, what’s the point of complaining? Why keep yourself in that pain?

Release frustrations

Find a healthy way to release feelings of anger, stress, disappointment, and frustration.

You can try imagining filling a backpack with your complaints, taking the pack off your back and setting it on the floor. If you start to feel the weight of it, take it off again.

You might try journaling about your day and turn the page, leaving your journal open to an empty page.

Take my suggestions or make up your own! The important thing it so find some way to give a voice to your frustrations and then release them.

 Make a change

If you find you have a bad day at work more often than not, it may be time to make a change in your career.

I’m a career coach with 100% success rate getting clients hired, promoted, and negotiating raises. If it’s time to make a change in your career, contact me at chrysta@liveandlovework.com to schedule a complimentary Love Your Work strategy session.

Tell me, what do you do when you’ve had a bad day at work? How do you turn it around?

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When to give up (and when not to)

Posted by on May 10, 2016 in Career Management | 3 comments

I’m ready to give up.

I started my business 7 months ago. It was my big bold career move- to follow my dream, to start my own business, to be an entrepreneur. Since starting my business I’ve failed. A lot.

A few weeks ago I thought long and hard about giving up. Let’s be real, giving up would make my life so much easier and so much less painful. I gave myself permission to give up.

And I haven’t given up. At least not yet.

Most days I hear stories of women stuck in their jobs and they’ve all but given up. Some of them really have given up. Some of them haven’t given up on their dreams, but they’ve given up on the idea that they’ll ever get anything better than what they’ve got right now.

How do you know when it’s time to give up? Here’s how I knew for me it wasn’t time for me to give up.

don't give up

 

When Not To Give Up

When you haven’t really gotten started

Anything worth your time takes time.

If you’re facing a big career change, give it at least 6 – 12 months. That could be 6 – 12 months to network, job search, or pursue a graceful exit from your current job.

When you aren’t good at it yet

When you try something new, it takes time to get good.

Don’t give up because you don’t know what you’re doing- learn how to do it, practice doing it, and don’t quit until you’re good at it.

When you haven’t asked for help

You can accomplish far greater things with help than without.

Get help before you quit- just make sure the help comes from a reputable source like a trusted mentor or career coach.

When you’re comparing yourself to someone else

Comparison is a sure way to settle for less.

Don’t worry about what someone else has– do what you can to do your best and be your best.

When you’re not choosing for yourself

Are you basing your decision on what’s best for someone else, or what’s best for you?

If you’re not making you’re own choices, you’re never making the choice that’s right for you.

When you’re afraid

Are you making a fear-based decision?

Doing something amazing is downright terrifying, but don’t let that stop you.

When it’s hard

It’s hard to make a change in your career. Don’t give up just because it’s hard.

When you failed

Failure is a sign of progress. If you failed, learn from your failure. Keep trying.

When to give up

Sometimes it is okay to give up. And that’s when what you’re doing isn’t working. You know, when you’re exhausted, overwhelmed, and burned out.

It may be time to give up what you’re doing to do something different, or it could be time to do it differently. Just know when you do something different, you’re probably going to want to give up as you get started.

Are you ready to give up? It may be time to ask for help from someone like me. Go ahead, ask.

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When to take advice about your career

Posted by on Apr 12, 2016 in Career Management | 0 comments

Everyone’s got an opinion and people love to dole out their best advice. From your mom to the Facebook “friend” you haven’t spoken to in years, everyone has advice about your career.

How do you know when to take career advice? Well, that’s a complex matter and I don’t want to be one more person giving you advice. Okay, maybe I do. But before I get to my advice to you I want to share something I recently learned about when to take advice.

I’ve been working with a business coach the last 6 months and she recently gave me some advice. Or coaching. Call it what you will.

She gave me this advice about my business and my initial response was a big bucket of nope. I felt a strong resistance to her insight.  For 3 weeks I pouted. For 3 weeks I complained. For 3 weeks I resisted. I was sure she wasn’t right about the advice she gave me.

Then I had an insight of my own.

My strong resistance wasn’t a sign she was wrong, it was a sign I was wrong.

Errr……

I realized that when someone gives me bad advice, I feel calm. When someone gives me advice that doesn’t resonate with me, I disagree without conflict. When someone gives me good advice I may feel the truth of it right away or I might feel resistant.

My resistance is a sign that maybe, just maybe, someone gave me advice worth considering.

Now I’m going to give you some advice. When you notice yourself resisting advice, take some time to carefully consider this advice. I’ll even share some questions to help you explore advice that brings up resistance.

when to take advice

5 Questions to know when take career advice

01. Does the advice come from someone you trust?

02. Does the advice come from someone with knowledge of your business, industry, or occupation?

03. Is the advice-giver successful in her career?

04. How do you feel in response to the advice? Why do you feel that way?

05. What fears come up related to the advice? Are you making a fear-based decision?

Sit with these questions. Explore your responses. Don’t be afraid to take advice that scares you just because it scares you. The only outcome with guaranteed results is doing the same thing you’ve always done (hint: you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.)

Now, let’s have some fun! What’s the best career advice you resisted? Share in the comments and sign up for my biweekly newsletter for career advice right to your inbox!

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Do people at work take advantage of you?

Posted by on Apr 5, 2016 in Career Management | 1 comment

For many years at different jobs I was the go-to gal, the most helpful person in the office. You have a problem? I am the problem-solver!

I dabbled in office equipment use and repair, IT, Microsoft Excel how-to, insurance, business law- you name it.

Need help with a special project? I can do that! Oh, sure, I can stay late. Bob called in sick again? I’ll cover Bob’s workload, no problem. I got this. You can count on me.

do you give more than you get

Once a co-worker wanted to take off 3 weeks during our busiest time of year. Her vacation request was approved because the owners were nice guys and wanted to accommodate her if at all possible. They didn’t understand or know the toll her absence would have on me.

I started to worry about how I would get all the work done by myself. I became extremely stressed. Then I realized no one had asked me to sacrifice my mental and physical health. Maybe I didn’t have to make it happen on my own.

I sent the owners an email detailing 2 options available to them. Option 1 included hiring a temporary employee to help while my co-worker was on vacation. Option 2 was being late on the reports that were due.

After I sent that email the owners decided my co-worker could not take 3 weeks off during our busiest time of year.

I didn’t have to do it all. I didn’t have to stretch my health to the limit. I chose not to allow myself to be taken advantage of.

For many years I went above and beyond what anyone else expected of me. I went above and beyond what I was paid to do. I went above and beyond any reasonable request and expectations- and most of the time the people I worked with didn’t even have to ask me to do it. I gave of myself until I didn’t have much left to give.

I was undervalued at work because I undervalued myself. I gave co-workers and clients permission to take advantage of me because I took advantage of myself.

I lacked healthy boundaries. I didn’t take care of myself. I took responsibility for things that were not my responsibility. I rarely, if ever, said no.

Allowing myself to be taken advantage of lead to increased stress, recurring health problems, and resentment of my co-workers and clients. I lived and worked that way for too long.

I was talking with a friend who hates her job and has a similar pattern of undervaluing herself, accepting less than she’s worth and doing more work for it.

She’s looking to change jobs and was considering accepting a position making $12,000 less than her salary requirement with fewer benefits than her current job.

This is how it happens.

We allow ourselves to be taken advantage of when we accept a job offer significantly below our salary requirement. Once in the job, we do far more than we were hired to do.

We ask for the raise we were promised and we grumble but continue to work our asses off when the promised raise doesn’t come through.

When other employees leave the company, we take on a portion of their work. Maybe we even take it all on.

It’s time to break this pattern. It’s time to set boundaries.

Stop doing work you haven’t been asked to do.

Stop agreeing to unreasonable requests.

Stop accepting less than you are worth.

Start believing in yourself. You can start by joining my group for regular inspiration and motivation to create positive and healthy habits at work and beyond!

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How to love a job you hate

Posted by on Mar 22, 2016 in Business Management, Career Management | 2 comments

The feeling of dread rises up every Sunday night. Tomorrow is Monday morning, and tomorrow you have to go back to the job you hate.

Walking in the door every morning is defeating.

You’re overworked and unappreciated, or you’re bored and ignored.

You leave work feeling drained and its all you can do to fall into bed at the end of the night. The exhaustion of just being there takes it’s toll. You’d look for another job if you had the time or energy but you don’t.

You cringe when you see your boss’s car in the parking lot, wishing she was away and you could get some work done without her interference. Isn’t it great when your boss is out of the office? Well, today is not your lucky day.

I get it. I really do. I’ve been there. And I know how to make it better. Are you ready?

You’ve got to work with what you’ve got. At least, that’s where you start.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about accepting less than you deserve. What I am talking about is getting good at tackling challenges, discovering solutions, and making the best of what’s in front of you every day.

You make the best of the job you hate because sometimes your situation improves when you improve your part in the situation. You make the best of the job you hate so you can respect yourself. You make the best of the job you hate so you can approach your next job with confidence.

Because, my friends, that’s how you begin to create a kick-ass life you’re gonna love. Now let’s get started.

i hate my job

How to love a job you hate

Show up

Show up every day. I mean really show up. Don’t half-ass your way through your work day.

If you’re bored at work, set challenges for yourself to keep things interesting. If you’re overwhelmed, give the task at hand 100% of your attention, one task at a time.

Make an impact

Don’t just do your job- do your best job.

Make an impact in your role, in your department, and in your organization. Make yourself an MVP.

Track your accomplishments

Keep track of your accomplishments. Not only will it come in handy at your next performance review, acknowledging your accomplishments will boost your mood and motivation.

Ask for what you need

Talk to your boss about your future. Don’t wait for your annual review- if you even get one.

Schedule a meeting with your boss and tell her what you’ve been working on. Ask for more work, or less, depending on your situation.

Ask your boss how you can exceed expectations. Want a raise? Ask your boss what it would take to get it. Ask for what you need.

 Stop complaining

Complaining is the fastest way to misery.

Stop complaining about everything that’s wrong with your job. Go on a complaining diet.

Stop comparing

Sometimes you pick up the slack for your lazy co-worker who is the boss’s favorite. Sometimes you feel like you’re not good enough.

Stop comparing yourself to others and you’ll find those things don’t bother you as much as they used to.

Get gratitude

Gratitude is the quickest way to happiness.

Be thankful for your coworkers, your boss, your job. There’s always something to be thankful for.

And while we’re on the subject of being thankful, don’t forget to say thanks.

Grow professionally

Never stop growing professionally. Join a professional association or networking group. Become a Toastmaster. Take a class online. Learn a new skill. Become an expert in one area of your work.

Knowledge is its own reward, but of course you’ll also have great skills to help you move ahead when the time comes.

Grow personally

Never stop growing personally. Read books and blogs that challenge your heart and mind. Watch Ted Talks. Go to therapy. Hire a life coach.

Keep becoming the best version of you.

 Plan your next bold move

Don’t languish in your job or your life. Make the most of each day, and while you’re at it, make plans for your next bold move.

You can be Ms. Sunshine and hate your job. You can be a star employee and get overlooked. You can do your best but it’s not going to change a crappy corporate culture or a bullying boss.

Do you hate your job and nothing’s going to change it? Are you stuck in a dead-end job? Have you tried everything and you continue to be passed over for promotion? Are you out of options?

It’s time to plan your next bold move, and you may need to enlist the help of a career coach. (Hey, I do that!)

I have a 100% success rate as a career coach.

I have had the honor of helping people achieve their next career move. I helped them get the job offer, the promotion, and the raise they wanted 100% of the time.

I know you want to have a fulfilling career, without stress and always being undervalued, but you struggle with clarity and confidence and a plan of how to make a career move. This is where I come in.

If your current work situation is less than what you want and what you deserve, this week I am offering a complimentary strategy session on how to uncover your next bold move and how to get there.

Contact me at chrysta@liveandlovework.com to schedule your complimentary strategy session.

Please consider this for yourself or pass this on to any friends, family or colleagues that need this kind of support. If you are a business owner and struggling with clarity and confidence about your next move or focus, this is for you, too.

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I’m a failure

Posted by on Feb 23, 2016 in Business Management, Career Management | 6 comments

Four months ago I launched my full-time coaching business and I failed.

Yep, you heard it here first, I’m a failure.

I’ve failed many times in many ways.

Now if you’re thinking this is some motivational post where I’m going to tell you how failing is awesome, well, I’m sorry, you’re wrong.

Failing is not awesome. It sucks. It sucks hard.

The one good thing about failing is getting it over with. Because we all fail. We all fail at something at some time.  It builds humility or whatever. To err is human, or so some dude said several hundred years ago.

But, really, of course I have failed. Being a full-time business owner is new to me. Some stumbles are to be expected. And I’m sure there’s some quote by some guy about how failing is sign of doing some epic shit.

And, well, at the end of the day, failure is all relative. What feels like failure may not be. So I failed to meet a goal. So I failed to know what I could not have known without experience. So I failed, so what?

So what’s next?

What’s next is I keep going. I learn what I can and try again. I keep trying. Anya Christina Emmanuella Jenkins once said something about how humans are lame morons for trying but that’s what makes them amazing.

Well then, I must be an amazing lame moron because I’m going to keep trying. I’m going to keep going. I’m going to succeed.

When I was younger my family was on welfare. I was one of those kids with my name on tree at the mall so a stranger could buy me a Christmas present. I graduated high school in Colorado without a winter coat. I started working and worked my way up to become a successful career professional. I succeeded, though not all at once and not without a little failure.

Being an entrepreneur is hard work and I’m not afraid of a little hard work. I got this. I’m going to accept my failures as they come, and I’m going to keep going and trying.

If you want to follow me as I keep going, as I keep trying, sign up for my biweekly newsletter (and maybe help me feel a little bit less of a failure, I’m just sayin’)!

Chrysta Bairre 2016

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