Fear is a powerful emotion that is inherently designed to save your life. The problem is, however, that when we feel fear there is rarely an actual threat, and yet we have the same response to fear as our distant ancestors- to avoid the thing we fear even though we are in no real danger.
Most often when we experience fear what we fear is change, yet our most enriching and satisfying life happens outside our comfort zone, when we are challenged to change our patterns of behavior and enjoy new experiences! Life is better when we face our fears!
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.” ~Henry Ford
So tell me, friends, are you willing to get what you’ve always got, or are you ready to face your fear?
I decided to change my relationship with fear and I did it in one simple step. Whenever I was afraid or uncomfortable in a situation, I did exactly the opposite of what my fear urged me to do. I knew that feeling fearful was an indication that an experience was outside my comfort zone, and getting uncomfortable is usually a good thing!
It became my “rule of fear”- if I don’t want to do it, I do it.
Of course this doesn’t mean that every fear I face is a positive experience, but it’s always a learning experience, and let me tell you what I’ve learned.
When I try a new experience, I don’t suck nearly as much as I feared I might. Many of my skills are transferable to new situations.
I’m pretty good at handling myself with confidence and intelligence in almost any situation. (Thank you, Toastmasters, for helping me developing my confidence!)
Often the thing I fear turns out to be something that’s actually quite fun once I give myself the opportunity to try it. Go figure!
The more I apply the rule of fear, the less fearful I feel. I can do anything! Okay, maybe not anything, but just about anything. I’m at least willing to try.
These days it’s actually exciting to face my fears. I’ve had enough experience doing the exact thing that scares me that I no longer try to avoid it, I view facing my fear as a great adventure! And isn’t life a great adventure?Join the Conversation
Last week I got fired. I have to be honest, a big part of the reason I wasn’t too upset about getting fired was the organization management wasn’t a good fit for me. I’d thought about quitting so many times over the past 9 months. So. Many. Times.
I’d applied for other jobs, even been on some interviews, but I kept thinking about what I really wanted to do with my life and it wasn’t getting another job.
Since I started writing this blog four years ago I thought about turning this blog into a business. It was always something I thought I’d do…. someday. It turns out someday is today.
Over the years I’ve coached and mentored friends, co-workers, and my fellow Toastmaster members. I’ve held leadership positions both inside and outside the workplace. I’ve spoken at Ignite Fort Collins, Toastmasters, professional associations, and facilitated a 3 hour training at a corporate retreat. I’ve been preparing for this. I’ve been training for this. I’m open for business!
I’m ready to take it to the next level and I hope you’ll join me. It’s YOUR turn to step up YOUR game. I want to help you take it to the next level. What’s holding you back? What have you got to lose?
For the next three weeks I’m offering FREE 15 minute coaching or motivational calls with you, my dear friends and readers. This is my gift to you for reading, commenting, and sharing this blog. This is my gift to you for supporting me in my journey, and I want to support you.
All you have to do is sign up for an open slot on my calendar, provide your phone number, and I’ll call you for a free 15 minute coaching or motivational call!
I’m really looking forward to getting to connect with you on a more personal level, and helping you take it to the next level. Talk to you soon!
Join the Conversation
I was fired from my job last week. I packed up my desk and drove straight to my Toastmasters meeting. My fellow members were surprised to see me considering I was just fired. “What am I going to do,” I asked them, “go home and mope?” No, truly there’s no where else I’d rather be than in the company of my one of my greatest support groups- my Toastmasters club. We had a great Toastmasters meeting, and I was in good spirits the rest of the evening.
I’ll admit, I did wonder what would happen the next day. Would I be wracked with self-doubt? Would I fall into a depression? Would I lay in bed in my pajamas and not get up? None of those things happened, and I continue to be in good spirits. I’m excited for my next opportunity! I’m hopeful, and encouraged, and motivated!
How did this happen? How did I become a high functioning adult that doesn’t let other people’s actions bring me down? How did I become someone that doesn’t need other people’s approval? How did I become a strong, confident woman that believes in myself? But wait- isn’t that’s what this blog is all about? It is!
I’ve been working on becoming happy, healthy, and balanced in my life and I’ve come so far. What a wonderful accomplishment! I’m not yet finished become the person I want to be; for certain it is a lifelong journey. I am happy to say I’ve made great progress.
I want to acknowledge this achievement and share some the wisdom that got me here.
Photo by Ryan
Loosing a job is one of the most stressful situations that will happen to you, but everyone I know has experienced it and we all moved on to other professional opportunities. Job loss is temporary.
You’ve got nothing to gain by beating yourself up. Give yourself a break! Be kind to yourself.
Lean on your support system. Let your friends and family help you- we all need help sometimes.
Every experience in life is a learning opportunity, and it’s the most difficult situations that provide the most growth. Be open to learning the lessons you need to learn. There is power in facing your mistakes and moving on.
I’ve fired employees and I’ve been fired- there is fault on both sides. Let’s face it, when an employee gets fired there’s a lack of leadership on some level.
Always file for unemployment, even if you were fired. The state department of labor makes a determination on your eligibility based on your statement and a statement from your former employer. The department of labor is impartial- let them make the decision on your eligibility.
Even if you don’t qualify for unemployment, there are often resources available for job seekers through your local workforce center- use them!
Whatever happened at your job, you have skills and experience to offer. Look for opportunities to work through volunteering, helping an elderly neighbor with physical tasks, or other community involvement.
You can’t change the past, and if you hold on it will drag you down. Let go.Join the Conversation