A few weeks ago I went complain-free. Now I’m not one to complain a lot but I have legitimate frustrations and concerns and, well, sometimes they get the better of me.
I didn’t even voice most of my complaints- it was my thoughts that were the problem. I thought about things that were unfair and how unhappy I was about it. I considered things that weren’t happening as agreed and I resented it. But I realized these complaints were just bringing me down so I made a decision to set them aside for 2 weeks.
Just a few days making the decision to shift my focus things started to change. One person honored an agreement we’d made. I was treated with greater respect by those around me. Something I’d asked for months ago took shape and I got what I asked for.
So I have this theory about how changing this one thing changed my life. When my attitude and outlook became more positive, open, and approachable, the people around me responded in kind. We prefer to be nice to those who are nice to us, don’t we? And wouldn’t we rather spend our time with someone that is pleasant, friendly, and hopeful?
I changed from someone carrying around my complaints to someone that was ready for good stuff to happen!
Of course this isn’t to say my life is now perfect, or I have every little thing I want, but I can say that those very things that upset are no longer a problem. In some cases those things have changed, and in other cases there is so much good stuff happening those upsetting things aren’t upsetting me.
My attitude changed and my life changed with it.
Have you ever experienced anything similar? How’d it work out for you? Are you willing to give up your complaints for a better life?
“The greatest discover of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.” ~Oprah Winfrey
Image credit Amanda TiptonJoin the Conversation
Oh, how we love to complain. I’ve got problems, you’ve got problems. We’ve got problems! And annoyances. And inconveniences. And frustrations. And on and on and on.
Photo by Robert Labonte
I learned years ago that whatever I focus on becomes the focus of my life. Duh, right? The thing is, when I complain I am oh-so-aware of whatever it is that is bothering me, and if I complain enough, well then I hardly notice the good stuff.
Of course the reverse is also true. If I am grateful enough, well then I hardly notice the bad stuff.
That temptation to complain remains. I have complaints, dammit! Sometimes my complaints aren’t even said out loud- sometimes they just swirl and twirl and consume my thoughts and it’s hard to think about anything else.
Lately I’ve been feeling discontent. I can sit and stew for hours on all the things I don’t like. But this behavior isn’t helping me, it’s hurting me. It’s robbing me of enjoyment. It’s stealing my peaceful rest. It’s taking all the things that are good and making them insignificant.
I’ve had enough of this shit. Enough complaining. Enough stewing. Just enough.
I’m going on a complain-free diet. For two weeks I will not complain. If I catch myself complaining I’ll stop right there and say three things I’m grateful for. I’m going to complain refrain for 14 days!
Will you join me?Join the Conversation
When I was working full-time I was always doing something. Working, attending Toastmasters, blogging, volunteering, and participating in other various professional organizations. I regularly attended networking events and training programs. I was kicking ass and loving it!
When I decided to try working part-time (or three-quarter time, really), I thought I’d get even more done. Just think of all the things I can accomplish! YEAH!!!!!
Only, as it happened, when I was working less, I started accomplishing less.
I spent several years being active in my personal and professional life, and setting myself up for success. Maybe on some level I thought the success would just keep rolling in. Maybe I needed a well-deserved break from so much doing. Maybe… well, I don’t know.
I have accomplished a lot in the last 2 years. I earned my Competent Communicator and my Advanced Leader Bronze certifications in Toastmasters. I held 2 officer roles in my local Toastmasters Club. I helped organize a fundraiser that raised nearly $5,000 for three local animal rescues, and I fostered 3 rabbits, a guinea pig, and 2 dogs (all where adopted into wonderful new homes)!
But as much as I accomplished, it was less than I hoped, and I found myself less than satisfied with my life and my progress than I was when I was working full-time.
I had lots of thoughts about all this, and I kept thinking I needed to get back into some positive habits I had in the past. These thoughts were in my head for quite some time and- BAM- one day last week I got out of my head, off my ass, and started doing something about it.
I rediscovered my passion, my motivation, my drive.
I couldn’t have written this blog post a month ago, and if someone else wrote these words, well, it’s likely I would have read them with a half-hearted, “yeah” in agreement.
I hope, for your sake, you’re more easily inspired and motivated than I was even just a month ago. I hope you read these words and you get out of your head, get off your ass, and do something!
Hey, if I can’t convince you, maybe Jaye will.Join the Conversation